| I should have known right away I had made a mistake. | | | | missal to avoid having to touch someone she didn't |
| It was a cold Sunday in November, and I was visiting in | | | | know. |
| Fayetteville, N.C. Following directions from my host, I | | | | Also, with the unique behavior of us Catholics, when |
| found the church and pulled into the parking lot. When I | | | | the Mass ends ("thank God, it's over"), we clear out as |
| walked in, I was met by a greeter with a smile that | | | | if we have heard a fire alarm. Three minutes after the |
| lighted up the day. | | | | end of a service, the janitor can arrive in and start |
| "Good morning! And how are you today? I'm Bob | | | | cleaning up. In sunny Florida, where I occasionally |
| Sullivan and it's great to have you with us." | | | | attend a Methodist Church with my sister, the |
| Warmed by this Southern hospitality, I made my way | | | | worshippers linger for a good while after the service |
| to a pew and sat down. As I glanced around at the | | | | to visit with one another. |
| other parishioners, I sensed I was being accepted as a | | | | There are rare exceptions. Before starting his Mass at |
| welcomed guest. I looked down at the red prayer | | | | the popular Saint Bernadette Parish in Seattle, Father |
| book. Whoops! I was in an Episcopal Church. | | | | Jim devotes five minutes for "getting to know you." He |
| Embarrassed, I left and hurriedly drove to the Catholic | | | | instructs those in the congregation to stand up and |
| Church two blocks away. As I went up the steps, I | | | | introduce themselves to everyone within reach. He |
| was monitored by a solemn looking usher. | | | | says, "Tell them who you are and what you do. Then |
| "You are late!" he announced in a voice loud enough to | | | | find out something about them." |
| be heard back at the Episcopal Church. With lowered | | | | Instantly, the church becomes alive and resounds with |
| eyes, I expressed by guilt and muttered an apology as | | | | the sound of happy talk. Each person shares with |
| I passed him. No response. Throughout the service and | | | | another. Then, as if by magic, the group becomes a |
| until I got in my car and drove away, I was treated like | | | | comfortable community of believers. |
| a trespasser meriting suspicion. I felt at home. | | | | If you want to see an expression of shock, try this out |
| Within the Catholic Church, I am curious why | | | | next Sunday. As you leave the parking lot and make |
| eighty-nine percent of the parishioners embrace to the | | | | your way to the church, say hello to two or three |
| concept that each believer is an island. Also, | | | | strangers. Last week, I did this and this is what |
| seventy-one percent appear to be saying "And stay | | | | happened: |
| the hell off my beach!" If Jesus had behaved like the | | | | An elderly woman in gray silk to whom I said "Good |
| majority of us Catholics, his only followers would have | | | | morning" took a moment to recover her balance from |
| been stray dogs and those looking for a handout. | | | | the jolt of hearing my voice. She clutched her black |
| My Aunt Mary was a good example of this. She was | | | | handbag close to her chest and with reluctance gave |
| a lifetime devout Irish-Catholic (one word in the Catholic | | | | me a tight smile. She then hurried into the church like a |
| vocabulary). Whenever she was upset, the phrase | | | | sand crab scurrying into a hole. |
| "Oh, Holy Mary, Mother of God" rolled with ease off | | | | When I gave a friendly hello to a portly man, he looked |
| the tip of her tongue. If frustrated, she'd call in the | | | | annoyed. He glanced at me with an expression which |
| whole family - "Oh Jesus, Mary, Joseph!" And when | | | | said, "Who the devil are you - some kind of a wise |
| the Church initiated the "handshake of peace", she | | | | guy?" Then he nodded and gruffly echoed my |
| wouldn't have been more offended if the Pope had | | | | greeting. |
| approved of polygamy. | | | | In no way am I critical of our behavior as today's |
| She was a person who always knew the answer | | | | Catholics. Through many years I have learned to |
| before asking a question. So she would say with | | | | accept it as the norm. And seventy-nine percent of |
| confidence, "Tell me, please - now just what does | | | | those who read this will agree with me that there is no |
| shaking hands with a complete stranger have to do | | | | need to change. However, I occasionally ask myself |
| with religion?" To confirm her disapproval of this | | | | why we are as we are. |
| practice, at that time during Mass she would fake | | | | Unfortunately, I'm not like Aunt Mary. |
| contemplation by burying her well-groomed head in a | | | | |